Grateful to Give

I’ve wanted to tell this story for a while. But I kept waiting for the perfect time to write about it and share it and turns out there isn’t one so now I feel pretty dumb for waiting.

We went to this tiny little park that is closest to our house when Anna came to shoot some photos of us.

Alice likes the little slides and the rickety bridge. She also likes to climb up the slides as every kid does, as I did. But she’s still little and doesn’t get the whole you need momentum to get up the slippery part. So we push her up from behind.

While we were there with Anna taking photos—not posed portraits, but we still wanted to look happy—Alice wanted to climb up the slide after going down a couple times.

It was pretty cute. She giggled the whole time til she got to the top and then had this very proud, pleased look on her face. 😊

Well on her way up one time her arms gave out. And her mouth caught her, lips followed quickly by teeth. It was a bad one based on the number of seconds it took for her to take a breath once the pain hit.

She cried her sad, pain-induced cry and Tyler and I took turns holding her back to calmness.

And all the while Anna took photos.

I heard the camera click and wind just a few times while Alice took shallow uneven breaths in my arms and blood from her lip soaked into my shirt and tears rolled down her cheeks.

And I felt grateful. Is that weird? I suddenly felt the importance of my and Tyler’s role as two of her comforters. I felt humbled by the responsibility I felt to be by her side, and this time hold her in my arms, during her pain.

It feels good to comfort someone. But I think the truer feeling there is gratitude. Grateful to be needed, grateful to give something of substance to someone else. Grateful to have tried to put more good into the world. Grateful to give.

I don’t have much else to say except that I’m glad she trusts me, I’m happy she’s here, with us, and I hope she can feel that.